Tomorrow my baby boy is three months old! OH MY GOD! NO WAY!!! This CAN NOT BE!? ALREADY?? It's been a very fast three months and he's is growing and changing so much every day! I look back in amazement at his progress from his May 5th traumatic entrance in to the world, and I'm so so proud of him. He is such a happy baby, very calm and cheerful. He doesn't fuss or get upset often, unless he needs something; to eat, to be changed, to be held, when he's sleepy... other than that hardly ever do you hear an unhappy sound out of his mouth. Brogan is an angel!! His favorite activities at three months include:

Watching lights!! Any lights, the TV, ceiling lights, hanging lights, outside lights, lamps... he likes all lights, still lights, moving lights, Doesn't matterOutdoors!! Looking outside, walking outside, sitting outside, he likes to watch the sky and the trees move, and the birds, he likes going for walks, but he falls asleep a lotJungle Gym/Bouncy Chair!! Reaching and grabbing at the 'buggies on his bouncy chair, reaching and grabbing at the links in the gymLaying on the floor and stretching out his limbs, practicing and getting ready to roll

"Talking!!" to Mommie, Daddy, Grandma, Grandpa, Grammy, the lights, outside, the birds, the TV, the doorknob, his hand, the wall, the birds on the railing... He makes all sorts of noises, ooo and aaa and mmmmm's, laughs and giggles, LOTS OF SMILES

Singing and Reading... Favorite songs include: 'Head, Shoulders, Knees and Toes,' and 'I'm A Little Tea Pot' and he loves all of his books

Bathtime!! Splishing and Splashing in the tub

Being loved on by Mommie and Daddy!! Sitting and being held by Mommie and Daddy... Sleeping with Mommie and Daddy... Doing most anything with Mommie and Daddy!!! =)

Tomorrow Daddy and I plan on taking Brogan out for his 3 Month Birthday!!! LOL We're just going to grab a cheap bite to eat and go to the park or somewhere to take some 3 month photos!

At 3 months postpartum, I'm doing okay. My cut is still healing, and other than that physically I'm almost back to prebaby! Emotionally I'm still having a time adjusting and dealing with the Emergency birth and the NICU experience. I find myself unable to watch or read stories of prematurity or emergency births... it reminds me of how close I came to losing Brogan and it upsets me. I find myself being paranoid of the smallest things, that something may happen to him... I think it's because I came so close to losing him without even really knowing, finding out weeks later just how close him and I were to death, is unsettling to me. That and a combo of not really being in any sort of control over how his birth and hospital stay went... it all happened so fast and I wasn't completely myself. All and all I'm dealing slowly but surely and am luckly to have Darrin who keeps me sane!

12 weeks and counting!

Okay so I've been keeping a pretty close eye on Brogan's developmental progress, just because he was born early and I want to catch any potential problems early. However I do believe babies will do things in their own time... I still like to keep an eye on every thing and know what's 'supposed' to be happening vs what he really does... Anyways.

According to this Baby Center chart Brogan is basically doing everything he's supposed to! If you notice it's divided into three columns, L to R they are, Mastered Skills: Things Most Kids can do, Emerging Skills: Things Half of Kids can do, and Advanced Skills: Things a Few Kids can do. All the circled yellow things he does easily and on a regular basis, and the ones in red he sorta does... kinda:

For example: Notices his hands?? I'm not sure, like cause he doesn't sit and stare/play with his hands like I've seen babies do but he does he out and grab things with his hands, so he uses them with a purpose. and the mini pushup? He can do it on Mommy and Daddy, but Brogan HATES Tummy Time, so he won't do it on the floor at all. He won't even lay on the floor most the time on his tummy... The next chart is from another site and it's only for Month 2; Again the only things he doesn't do are in red:

Same thing here, 45 degrees and mini push ups on Mommy and Daddy only, and we are quite up to rolling yet... but he tries to sometimes. So I think, in my professional opinion... LOL that my baby is totally on target!

YAY BROGAN!

Plans? What plans...

Motherhood is a blast. I love it, who know right? Nearly the 3 month mark I'm having a lot of reflecting on the plans I had made...

I'd planned on having a 3rd trimester, 3D/4D ultrasound and belly bump photos taken; instead I ended up having him the day before the appt, and getting newborn photos instead.

I'd planned on attempting the most natural vaginal childbirth possible for me; I ended up with an Emergency C Section.

I'd planned on breastfeeding exclusively (no bottles, or nipples whatsoever) and not introducing a Binky till well past the one month mark if ever; he ended up using a Binky since birth (NICU nurses gave it to him) and he uses formula occasionally, and bottles... also because he's had them since birth.

I'd also planned to breastfeed immediately after birth; I ended up not seeing him again till he was 36 hours old.

I'd planned on taking 6 maybe 8 weeks of Maternity Leave; I ended up with 10 and a half total.

Honestly. I don't care a wit either. I'm just glad he's happy, healthy and here with me =)

He's a Smiling Drooly MONSTER!

Brogan has totally 'mastered' smiling. He smiles ALL the time, at everything. At anything. At the blank white wall. At the doorknobs. At the birds outside, the lights in the living room, the TV, his animals and his buggies. My favorite has to be when he smiles at me or Darrin though, when he looks me straight in the eye and smiles sooo big. I can't help but love my little boy so much. He's also grown so much, he's getting so big and chunky now. I finally feel like I relax and breathe a little bit. I worried so much during the first months, is he eating enough, is he eating often enough, should I wake him up to eat, should I give him extra, is he gaining? But, I know now that he is, and I have the visual evidence to prove it! SEE the picture below!! The outfit next to him is the outfit Lacey sent me, it's a size Premature, from Carter's. When we got it, it was the only thing that actually fit him, everything else was WAY too big, now he's like WAY bigger than it. I love it.

New things going on with Brogan other than the smiling: Drooling. Drool drool drool, everywhere all the time... I'm beginging to wonder if he's not getting ready to start teething. I didn't think he would/could this early but he's got mass amounts of drool and he's mouthing/eating everything he can get into his mouth. LOL my shoulder... his blanket, clothes... it's hilarious. He's staying awake more and more, and sleeping better and longer at night. He loves sitting up, whether it be in his Bumbo or on my lap with me holding him up, he's got some awesome head control, except when he's sleepy. He's starting to babble a bit, he coos and oohs and ahhs and he squeals and yells at things. Basically he's starting to be all kinds of fun.

Work Makes Me Weary

Well. I started back to work on Saturday, closed Saturday night and Tuesday night. It's... well it's work. I miss Brogan so much while I'm gone and pumping at Target is a pain in the... you know. I don't much enjoy any of it.

Thankfully everything seems to be working out well with Darrin watching Brogan in the evenings, I think he really enjoys spending the time with his Daddy. I think it'll be good for them in the long run too, all the extra time together without me around... I mean I get tons of time with just me and Brogan. Darrin should get some too.

9.5 weeks and counting...

I can not believe that it's been 9 weeks and 2 days already since I had Brogan!

Time really does FLY right by doesn't it. It's been over two months since I had my precious boy, and he is growing sooo fast, it blows my mind. I'm supposed to return to work on the 15th, though I really don't want to, I'd much rather spend all my days being Mommy and nothing else. However we do need the money, and I do miss adult interaction. I think in the long run I'll be happier if I can get out of the house, by myself, even if it's just to go to work a couple times a week. Last night, I really really wanted to go out, just out, alone, without Darrin and without Brogan. I didn't even really want to go anywhere specific, just out of the house. It's funny though because when me and Darrin do go out and someone watches Brogan I miss him terribly and usually about halfway into our date, I just want to come home and see my darling baby boy.

Isn't that just a mess... lol

Brogan is doing better today with the shots, he's still tender, and crabby. He wouldn't sleep all morning either and when you add in the med.s he has to take for the thrush, he was just not my happy, mild mannered little sonshine. BUT he's finally asleep now, and I think when he does wake he'll be in a much much better mood.

His two month photos are done and ready to be picked up, I'm going to send Darrin after them when he gets home, for those and the birth announcements... I wanted to go with him, but I really really don't want to wake the baby... and Daddy's off work in three minutes. LOL

That's all I have to ramble about today!

Much Love.

Vile Vaccinations

Brogan had his two month doctors appointment this morning. He is growing very very well; he's at the lower end of the percentile ratings for his age group BUT that's perfectly normal for a preemie. He's now at 10 pounds and 8 ounces, up from 6 pounds 6.7 ounces at birth! That's a increase of over 4 pounds since birth! He's also now 21 1/4 inches long, up from 18 1/2 at birth, that's almost 3 inches longer!! I don't remember his head circumference at birth, I'll have to look it up but it's up to 15 3/4 inches now.

He also got his first round of Vaccinations today, 3 shots and 1 oral. He liked the oral stuff, LOL probably cause it tasted good. The nurse said it's a lot like sugar water. Darrin held his arms and talked to him while he got his shots, and I did my very best not to watch and cry. I didn't succeed. I cried. He wailed, not the loudest he's ever wailed, but it was definitely a

'I'm hurt, what the fuck'

not the normal...

'I'm hungry; I'm wet; I'm bored'

that I'm used too. Now we're home. He's pretty cranky, and fussy, his thighs hurt as he got shots in both of them, he's been nursing on and off since we got back. I think more out of comfort than hunger, and I'm going to give him another dose of Baby Tylenol at 3:10. He also has a very mild case of thrush. I caught it before it was very bad, and the doctor got us some med.s for it. Should clear up in a week or so, not a big deal at all.

All and all, everything is okay.

Sleepin So Superbly

For the first time, Brogan slept thru the night, at night!!

Yesterday he did the same thing but it was earlier (9pm to 3amish) so Mommy and Daddy didn't really get any more extra sleep. LOL He fell asleep last night at around 12:30/1:00ish and he slept all the way thru till 7:22 am this morning. When I woke up, looked at the clock and realized what time it was I nearly had a heart attack and went running to check on him. Sure enough he was sleeping soundly, perfectly fine. I am a little ashamed to admit that I promptly woke him up and fed him. He was so hungry; he has never drained my breasts that fast before, and because of it he ended spitting up a whole bunch. Looking back in hindsight now, I probably should have just left him be till he was ready to wake on his own, but I was super worried.

Also yesterday he started putting things into his mouth! lol he was hungry, he reached over picked up his Piglet by the ear and put his ear into his mouth and tried to nurse it! Then this morning he did the very same thing with his blanket, picked it up and put it into his mouth to nurse it.

I'm so proud of my little man! He'll be two months on the 5th of July and he seems to be right on track!! Being born abruptly 5 weeks early hasn't seemed to affect him in the least so far. I'm so proud!

Brogan can do everything on the one month section; and most everything on the two month section. I'm not sure what they mean by notices his hands, he sucks on them all the time and he grabs at things, so is that noticing them?? Or do they mean 'find his hands' like when babies look and play with them, cause he doesn't do that yet. He can do the mini push up and he occasionally bears his weight. He doesn't hold his head steady all the time, but he can for long periods of time when he's awake and active... up to a minute or two at a time. He is doing a couple of the three month things sometimes... he sometimes tracks moving objects, he squeals every once in a while when he's really excited, and he bats at his buggies on his chair and some of his other toys too!

All in all; Brogan is doing very very well!

My silly little man

Oh my silly little man is super adorable. Yesterday and today he's been super snuggly, I love it. Yesterday he was laying up on my shoulder, and he was facing my neck and he kept snuggling closer and closer and closer into my neck and he was breathing all into my neck and it tickled so bad. I was giggling hysterically, and he just kept trying to get closer. Then this morning I laid him down in bed with me after Darrin left for work, and his started out like an inch from me and wiggled himself all up against me.



He's getting so big, and so active. He's also starting to have definite likes and dislikes. He hates shoes with a passion, can't stand being changed or having a bare bottom, however he can't stand being dirty. He likes when we play with him and spend time with him, he likes to be talked to, and he's starting to 'talk' back. I love him so much!

Movin' and Groovin'

It's raining today, kinda sad cause I wanted to take Brogan for another walk. He seems to like being outside so much yesterday, and walking is good for me. Maybe it'll stop raining soon, and we'll be able to go for a quick walk before Family Night tonight. Brogan is getting stronger and moving and talking more and more everyday, Darrin thinks he'll be crawling anytime now! I think it'll be a couple months yet, but he's well on his way. He's getting really good at moving his head, he can pick it up, and move it from side to side. I'm so proud of him. I have videos on Brogan's Youtube account if anyone wants to see!!

He's getting so big!

Oh my goodness!! My baby boy is growing so fast and getting so big! He is almost seven weeks old now; Brogan no longer fits any of his preemie clothes, and finally fits his newborn clothes. However all of his 0 to 3 month stuff is still way way too baggy, they fall right off his shoulders. Still gotta fatten him up a little bit. LOL. Today is Darrin's day off so Darrin and I took Brogan to the park for the first time. He seemed to like it, he wouldn't stay awake! I've never seen him sleep that soundly before. Normally he's a pretty sound sleeper, once he's out; He is OUT, but WOW... We tried and tried and tried to wake him up, but he was out like a light. Didn't wake up till we got to the Barnes and Noble parking lot when he decided it was time to eat. Now we're hanging out here, he's wide wake, guess he likes the bookstore too! That's a real good thing, considering how much time Darrin and I spend here. :)

Bathtime Fun!

Tomorrow morning is Brogan's church dedication, I wanted to make sure that he was all clean and good smelling for the service and his after party at Grandma's house. Now normally Brogan loves the bathtub. He likes to play in it, he sucks the water off his fingers and smiles, but for some reason tonight he was very cranky, he cried and fussed the entire time. He was just not enjoying himself at all. So we just hurried up and finished washing him, got him out, wrapped him up, cuddled him to make him happy. We then took him into his room to get him all ready for bed, went to unwrap him so we could dress him annnndddd... Brogan had left us a present. He had took the biggest dump ever in his duckie towel. Two days worth of poopie in his cute duckie towel!! I was initially worried he was going to do it in the middle of the church service, but instead he waited till right after his bath. LMAO Silly boy!! Gotta love being a Mommie.

Who, Why, When, How?

Hey I wanted to start a blog to post pictures and updates about Brogan. He's getting so big, so fast and since I don't really use my Myspace anymore I don't really have anywhere to just type out everything about his day to day accomplishments and his devolpmental progress.